SILLY POEMS FOR KIDS!
Welcome to Paul Kaplan Books!
I write silly poems for kids, like the award-winning book,
The Thingy That's StringyClick around and have a good time!
My Books!
Here's my award-winning book,
The Thingy That's Stringy
It won two separate "5-Star Review" awards!!
Introducing Fanny Flub -- she drank all the water in her tub.
And Snoozy Suzie -- she stores her naps in a box.
You'll meet a girl whose toenails grew so long they cross the street, and Bed Bug Doug who can't get any sleep.
This collection of over one hundred silly poems for kids by Paul Kaplan is sure to keep YOU awake (and laughing) too!
POEMS!
Here's a peek at 3 poems from...
The Thingy That's Stringy!
(All together, the book has 137 poems -- that's a lot!)
I hope you laugh!!
Crazy Harriet lives next door,
she screams at squirrels at half past four:
"STOP EATING MY SEEDS -- THEY'RE FOR THE BIRDS!!"
But squirrels keep eating (cuz they don't know words).
Have you ever met a half-a-giraffe?
Funny beasts – they’ll make you laugh.
They eat half their lunch, take half their naps . . .
but honestly, they’re lovely chaps.Now, half-a-giraffes have one big concern,
(and it’s something that I was surprised to learn).
It’s an issue that worries them lots and lots;
it’s where can they keep all their leftover spots?
My mom just bought a used car;
just for in town – not for too far.She said it seemed to be a good price,
and for the money, it seemed quite nice.I guess it was a pretty good deal;
the only problem – it’s missing a wheel.
REVIEWS
“Original, clever, eccentric, whimsical, The Thingy That's Stringy is guaranteed fun for kids from start to finish.” – Midwest Book Review“This poetry collection is a joyful explosion of absurd imagination, silly wordplay, and delightfully ridiculous scenarios...exactly what a book of ridiculous poems should deliver.” – Kid’s Picture Book Review5-Stars! “The Thingy That’s Stringy is a laugh-out-loud collection of poems that kids will absolutely love...with quirky characters and hilarious situations, your kids will be in stitches! I highly recommend this book!” – Reader Views5-Stars! “The Thingy That’s Stringy is a treat for the funny bone in all of us...with over 130 poems, all silly, all rhyming, and with spectacular and funny illustrations, this book is something to be cherished and enjoyed.” – Readers’ Favorite5-Stars! “The Thingy That’s Stringy is full of short poems that bounce quickly from deli counters selling laughs, to runaway noses, to quirky characters like a fish that doesn't like getting wet...I found myself laughing out loud more than once at these poems that are quite Dr. Seuss-esque in silliness. As an educator, this book could be used to teach the elements of poetry, such as rhyme, alliteration, repetition. Kids who love to laugh (and grown-ups too) will enjoy this clever collection.” – Readers’ FavoriteWonderful book of ridiculous poems!
"This book is a delightful collection of wildly wacky poems, silly stories, and imaginative illustrations that are sure to bring endless smiles and giggles to all! I bought this book for my 9-year-old niece and she absolutely loved it! Highly recommend it!" – Amazon CustomerA great book that’s not afraid to be silly!
"Such a fun book! My kids (ages 6-14) have all been enjoying it since we got it last week. Safe for all ages and great illustrations as well. You won't be disappointed!" – Amazon CustomerWonderful whimsical read!
"This one is a total classic if you’re into whimsical, bouncy rhymes that make everyday things seem way more exciting. Honestly, it’s one of those rare kids' books that won't make you lose your mind after reading it for the tenth time in a row." – Amazon Customer
About Me
Paul Kaplan is an award-winning children’s book author who has read his silly poems to kids (and adults!) in schools, libraries, cafés, and at nature celebrations.He’s the author of The Thingy That’s Stringy, containing over 130 wacky poems with original illustrations, for ages 8-12 (grades 3-7).Paul is a husband, father of two, and has ants in his kitchen that never want to leave. They all happily live in a New Jersey suburb, just outside New York City.Sadly, Paul suffers from “Rhyme-all-the-time” disease; an incurable affliction that drives his wife crazy.
Contact
Want to send me a message? Ask me a question?Want to leave an honest review of my book?
Leave a Review!
If you or your child has read one of my books, I'd love for you to leave an honest review!
You can leave your review on Amazon, and if you're a Goodreads member, it would be greatly appreciated if you also left your review there too (you can simply copy and paste your Amazon review, into Goodreads).
Leave a Review!
If you or your child has read one of my books, I'd love for you to leave an honest review!
You can leave your review on Amazon, and if you're a Goodreads member, it would be greatly appreciated if you also left your review there too (you can simply copy and paste your Amazon review, into Goodreads).
FUN STUFF!!
for kids ;)
Click an image to download or print a full-size version! ↓
Coloring Pages
In My House
Look It! Lick It!
Kangaroo
Word Search
Help Reuben Catch His Runny Nose!!
Bonus Track!!
Btw, this bonus content will make more sense if you've already read the book. If you still need to get the book, click this button:
A SNEAK PEAK BEHIND SOME POEMS!!
1. A Goat in a Coat pg. 54 – I challenged myself to write a poem using the same ending sound for every rhyme (for example, goat/coat/boat). So . . . how many different words did I come up with??2. A Horse Walks into a Barn pg. 156 – a riff on the classic joke, “A <fill in the blank> walks into a bar . . .”3. Captain Hanger pg. 68 – loosely based on Disney’s “Captain Hook”.4. Captain Queasy pg. 69 – yeah . . . I don’t like boats. I get queasy quite quickly. (Hey! Did you catch the alliteration with all those "q" words?)5. Crazy Harriet pg. 1 – she really was my neighbor who screamed at squirrels . . . seriously.6. Elliott J. Fish pg. 46 – a few years ago, I read this poem to a group of adults at an “open mic night” event. They loved it – especially where it mentions a lobster named Bisque – and they asked me to read it again (which, of course, I did).7. Eyelobes and Earballs pg. 58 – I love a good sneeze or two (or five) . . . though after the fifth sneeze, I feel like this poem’s illustration.8. Following Directions pg. 63 – I’m easily confused. Not only that, I also get lost when driving around my own neighborhood, even though I’ve lived there for nearly 30 years.9. Fruit Cocktail pg. 56 – when I was a kid, I really did eat the cherry last!10. General McSneezeweed pg. 160 – I went with my family to an arboretum (a public garden with beautiful flowers and trees). As we were walking through, I saw a wildflower labelled, “Sneezeweed”. I thought that name was hysterical – so I immediately wrote this poem as we continued to walk around the garden.11. Glitter pg. 15 – I really do hate glitter and sparkles . . . sorry. Please don’t send me a greeting card with glitter or sparkles.12. Grandma Has a Parakeet pg. 98 – my grandmother really did have a parakeet; his name was Bingee, but I changed his name to Bingo for the poem.13. Hay Is for Horses pg. 157 – my other grandmother always said, “Hay is for horses!” every time I said, “Hey!” She was very nice. (She also made tasty cookies – she called them Bits Cookies.)14. Heigh-Ho! pg. 77 – based on Disney’s 1937 film adaptation of “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs”.15. Holy Cannoli! pg. 131 – my wife and I went to an event that had disgusting-tasting refreshments . . . so, this poem is based on that real event (though I did embellish the poem a bit).16. Isaac and Zinky pg. 92 – they really were my pet goldfish when I was 5. Oh . . . were you wondering about the random “Oswego” comment from Isaac? Here’s the deal: I once tried to make small talk with another father on the SUNY Oswego college campus (in upstate NY), about the very difficult, snowy drive the prior time we drove up to the school. My daughter (who was eavesdropping), thought my awkward attempt at small talk was hilarious, and she never lets me forget it. (But yeah – the "Oswego" reference has absolutely nothing to do with this poem about goldfish, but Isaac’s attempt at small talk made me laugh . . . so . . .)17. Jack Be Clumsy pg. 21 – based on the Mother Goose nursery rhyme, “Jack Be Nimble”.18. Jack Sprat pg. 159 – I took the title from the old English nursery rhyme.19. Kids’ Menu pg. 28 – I’ve often wondered about chicken fingers . . . I mean, if chickens have fingers, do they pick their beaks?20. Lazy Eye pg. 128 – when I was a kid, I was told I had a lazy eye. As an adult, I’m pretty sure I have a lazy brain . . . I think?? (I’m too lazy to think about it . . .)21. Liv Loves Her Liverwurst pg. 88 – seriously . . . do you eat this stuff??22. On Top of Spaghetti pg. 134 – this poem’s title was taken from the classic children's song.23. Refrigerator Pizza pg. 50 – when my daughters were young, we made up a game where I’d pretend to make a pizza on their bellies with disgusting food from the refrigerator (which tickled and delighted them greatly!).24. Shopping’s Not for Me pg. 36 – this was ME when I was your age. I hated going to department stores (what you kids would call the mall) because they made me irritable and cranky. Even today, as a married man, my wife still needs to buy me a cookie.25. Why Do Bees Make Honey? pg. 70 – the reference to “Oreos” is, of course, to that delicious cookie made by Nabisco/Mondelēz International.PS...one more!
Short Poem pg. 106 – sometimes I just write too much (I can be too wordy). I wish I could convey my thoughts more concisely, using fewer words. Well . . . now I’m writing too much about this . . .
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