SILLY POEMS FOR KIDS!
Welcome to Paul Kaplan Books!
I write silly poems for kids, like the award-winning book,
The Thingy That's StringyClick around and have a good time!
My Books!
Here's my award-winning book,
The Thingy That's Stringy
It's available as a paperback and eBook!
And it's won two separate "5-Star Review" awards!!
Introducing Fanny Flub -- she drank all the water in her tub.
And Snoozy Suzie -- she stores her naps in a box.
You'll meet a girl whose toenails grew so long they cross the street, and Bed Bug Doug who can't get any sleep.
This collection of over one hundred silly poems for kids by Paul Kaplan is sure to keep YOU awake (and laughing) too!
POEMS!
Here's a peek at 3 poems from...
The Thingy That's Stringy!
(All together, the book has 137 poems -- that's a lot!)
I hope you laugh!!
Crazy Harriet lives next door,
she screams at squirrels at half past four:
"STOP EATING MY SEEDS -- THEY'RE FOR THE BIRDS!!"
But squirrels keep eating (cuz they don't know words).
Have you ever met a half-a-giraffe?
Funny beasts – they’ll make you laugh.
They eat half their lunch, take half their naps . . .
but honestly, they’re lovely chaps.Now, half-a-giraffes have one big concern,
(and it’s something that I was surprised to learn).
It’s an issue that worries them lots and lots;
it’s where can they keep all their leftover spots?
My mom just bought a used car;
just for in town – not for too far.She said it seemed to be a good price,
and for the money, it seemed quite nice.I guess it was a pretty good deal;
the only problem – it’s missing a wheel.
REVIEWS
“Original, clever, eccentric, whimsical, The Thingy That's Stringy is guaranteed fun for kids from start to finish.” – Midwest Book Review
“This poetry collection is a joyful explosion of absurd imagination, silly wordplay, and delightfully ridiculous scenarios...exactly what a book of ridiculous poems should deliver.” – Kid’s Picture Book Review
5-Stars! “The Thingy That’s Stringy is a laugh-out-loud collection of poems that kids will absolutely love...with quirky characters and hilarious situations, your kids will be in stitches! I highly recommend this book!” – Reader Views
“The Thingy That’s Stringy is a treat for the funny bone in all of us...with over 130 poems, all silly, all rhyming, and with spectacular and funny illustrations, this book is something to be cherished and enjoyed.” – Readers’ Favorite
The Thingy That’s Stringy is full of wacky poems, like deli counters selling laughs, runaway noses, and many quirky characters...I laughed out loud at these Dr. Seuss-esque poems so many times. As an educator, I use this book to teach the elements of poetry; rhyme, alliteration, repetition. Kids and grown-ups will enjoy this clever collection.” – Readers’ Favorite
Wonderful book of ridiculous poems!
"This book is a delightful collection of wildly wacky poems, silly stories, and imaginative illustrations that are sure to bring endless smiles and giggles to all! I bought this book for my 9-year-old niece and she absolutely loved it! Highly recommend it!" – Amazon Customer
A great book that’s not afraid to be silly!
"Such a fun book! My kids (ages 6-14) have all been enjoying it since we got it last week. Safe for all ages and great illustrations as well. You won't be disappointed!" – Amazon Customer
Wonderful whimsical read!
"This one is a total classic if you’re into whimsical, bouncy rhymes that make everyday things seem way more exciting. Honestly, it’s one of those rare kids' books that won't make you lose your mind after reading it for the tenth time in a row." – Amazon Customer
High Praise from Author James Mullaney!
“You are truly a gifted and creative person. After reading your book again – cover to cover – and seeing your amazing artwork, I consider you a genius of the highest order. I've worked with and known many such people over the years, including Carl Sagan, Wernher von Braun, Arthur Clarke, Ray Bradbury, Neil deGrasse Tyson.”
– James Mullaney is an astronomy author, speaker, and contributor to Carl Sagan's award-winning "Cosmos" PBS-Television series. His work has received recognition from Sir Arthur Clarke, Johnny Carson, Ray Bradbury, and Dr. Wernher von Braun.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE this book!
“Just up my alley for humor!!! I can't wait to read this to my grandkids. Made me smile continuously throughout! I'm so impressed the author did all the drawings too. What a treasure! Congratulations!” – LA Fairhoff, BookSirens
The Author Has an Amazing Sense of Humor!
“I chuckled at these poems more times than I can remember! They are hilarious! (My favorite is "Toni's Toenails". Haha!) The author has an amazing sense of humor. The illustrations alone are a dead give-away that the entire book is creatively comedic!” – Michelle, BookSirens
Kids Will Get Loads of Laughs!
“First, the cover grabbed my attention. I love artwork like this book has. Kids will definitely get loads of laughs reading these silly poems, and they’ll want to share this book with their friends.” – Karen, BookSirens
A Big Hit With My 9-Year-Old!
“My 9-year-old loves it! She says that any kid would love to read it because it’s so funny and also so entertaining.” – Amazon Customer
Quirky, Playful, Imaginative!
“The Thingy That’s Stringy is a fun, lighthearted collection delivering playful, imaginative, and silly poems in the best way. They're easy to read aloud, with a rhythm kids will enjoy (and just enough cleverness to keep adults smiling). A great pick for anyone looking for something wacky, clever and fun!” – Amazon Customer
Great Book of Kids Poems!
"Great book of fun and whimsical poems! My kids have been loving it!” – Amazon Customer
Fun Read with Grandchildren
“Fun poems with wonderful illustrations! A great read with grandchildren!” – Amazon Customer
Laugh Out Loud!
“I enjoyed this book a lot! It hooked me early, and I laughed out loud numerous times...so many favorites: "Half-a-Giraffe", "My Kitty's Named Doggy", and so many more! In addition to these wacky poems, Kaplan nailed it with the spot-on visuals -- a thoroughly thoughtful, engaging experience!” – Amazon Customer
Delightfully Silly Poems That Will Make You Smile!
“These nonsense poems (and their wacky illustrations) are a delightful read from beginning to end; imaginative, quirky, and hilariously absurd! This book will be a hit with children (and parents)! If you enjoy whimsical poetry, playful language, and charming illustrations, this book is well worth getting!” – Ingrid, BookSirens
Wonderfully Playful Poetry Collection
"The Thingy That’s Stringy is a wonderfully playful poetry collection that embraces the absurd, the unexpected, and the pure joy of silliness. Paul Kaplan creates a lively world populated by unforgettable characters, exaggerated situations, and mischievous humor, giving childhood the freedom to laugh at ridiculous ideas and to let imagination run without limits." – Shannon Pilcher, Goodreads
Be Careful! You Might Laugh Your Head Off!
"The Thingy That's Stringy is very wise and hilarious! Kaplan is a master of taking metaphors literally; e.g., someone who wants to borrow a nap that someone else is taking, dogs that walk people, a kitten that catches colds (not mice) -- and so on (there are over 130 poems that kids will love). My copy is now plastered with Post-it Notes in case I need a poem to make me chuckle or laugh my head off!"
– Dr. Paul Levinson, Professor of Communications and Media Studies at Fordham University, media theorist, and award-winning novelist and short story writer.
My Son Loves This Book! (Dr. Seuss and Shel Silverstein vibes!)
“I have an adult son who has significant disabilities. Since he was in utero, I've been reading him Dr. Seuss books. He LOVES them and always gets a huge smile when I read them, even to this day. I've now read him The Thingy That’s Stringy and he absolutely LOVES it too!! What I love about this book, is it combines the great elements of both Dr. Seuss and Shel Silverstein. If you and your kids love reading fun, whimsical poetry, I highly recommend this book!” – Eric Duvall, BookSirens
Meet Paul!
Paul Kaplan is an award-winning children’s book author who has read his silly poems to kids (and adults!) in schools, libraries, cafés, and at nature celebrations.He’s the author of The Thingy That’s Stringy, containing over 130 wacky poems with original illustrations, for ages 7-12 (grades 2-7) -- but teens and adults love the poems as well!Paul is a husband, father of two, and has ants in his kitchen that never want to leave. They all live happily in a New Jersey suburb, just outside New York City.Sadly, Paul suffers from “Rhyme-all-the-time” disease; an incurable affliction that drives his wife crazy.
🎙️ Watch my Podcast interview!!
Contact
Want to send me a message? Ask me a question?Want to leave an honest review of my book?
Leave a Review!
If you or your child has read one of my books, I'd love for you to leave an honest review!
You can leave your review on Amazon, and if you're a Goodreads member, it would be greatly appreciated if you also left your review there too (you can simply copy and paste your Amazon review, into Goodreads).
Leave a Review!
If you or your child has read one of my books, I'd love for you to leave an honest review!
You can leave your review on Amazon, and if you're a Goodreads member, it would be greatly appreciated if you also left your review there too (you can simply copy and paste your Amazon review, into Goodreads).
FUN STUFF!!
for kids ;)
Click an image to download or print a full-size version! ↓
Coloring Pages
In My House
Look It! Lick It!
Kangaroo
Word Search
Help Reuben Catch His Runny Nose!!
Eddie Grows His Eggplants 🌱 🥚
(tap the image below to download your free PDF copy!)
Bonus Track!!
Btw, this bonus content will make more sense if you've already read the book. If you still need to get the book, click this button:
A SNEAK PEAK BEHIND SOME POEMS!!
1. A Goat in a Coat pg. 54 – I challenged myself to write a poem using the same ending sound for every rhyme (for example, goat/coat/boat). So . . . how many different words did I come up with??2. A Horse Walks into a Barn pg. 156 – a riff on the classic joke, “A <fill in the blank> walks into a bar . . .”3. Captain Hanger pg. 68 – loosely based on Disney’s “Captain Hook”.4. Captain Queasy pg. 69 – yeah . . . I don’t like boats. I get queasy quite quickly. (Hey! Did you catch the alliteration with all those "q" words?)5. Crazy Harriet pg. 1 – she really was my neighbor who screamed at squirrels . . . seriously.6. Elliott J. Fish pg. 46 – a few years ago, I read this poem to a group of adults at an “open mic night” event. They loved it – especially where it mentions a lobster named Bisque – and they asked me to read it again (which, of course, I did).7. Eyelobes and Earballs pg. 58 – I love a good sneeze or two (or five) . . . though after the fifth sneeze, I feel like this poem’s illustration.8. Following Directions pg. 63 – I’m easily confused. Not only that, I also get lost when driving around my own neighborhood, even though I’ve lived there for nearly 30 years.9. Fruit Cocktail pg. 56 – when I was a kid, I really did eat the cherry last!10. General McSneezeweed pg. 160 – I went with my family to an arboretum (a public garden with beautiful flowers and trees). As we were walking through, I saw a wildflower labelled, “Sneezeweed”. I thought that name was hysterical – so I immediately wrote this poem as we continued to walk around the garden.11. Glitter pg. 15 – I really do hate glitter and sparkles . . . sorry. Please don’t send me a greeting card with glitter or sparkles.12. Grandma Has a Parakeet pg. 98 – my grandmother really did have a parakeet; his name was Bingee, but I changed his name to Bingo for the poem.13. Hay Is for Horses pg. 157 – my other grandmother always said, “Hay is for horses!” every time I said, “Hey!” She was very nice. (She also made tasty cookies – she called them Bits Cookies.)14. Heigh-Ho! pg. 77 – based on Disney’s 1937 film adaptation of “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs”.15. Holy Cannoli! pg. 131 – my wife and I went to an event that had disgusting-tasting refreshments . . . so, this poem is based on that real event (though I did embellish the poem a bit).16. Isaac and Zinky pg. 92 – they really were my pet goldfish when I was 5. Oh . . . were you wondering about the random “Oswego” comment from Isaac? Here’s the deal: I once tried to make small talk with another father on the SUNY Oswego college campus (in upstate NY), about the very difficult, snowy drive the prior time we drove up to the school. My daughter (who was eavesdropping), thought my awkward attempt at small talk was hilarious, and she never lets me forget it. (But yeah – the "Oswego" reference has absolutely nothing to do with this poem about goldfish, but Isaac’s attempt at small talk made me laugh . . . so . . .)17. Jack Be Clumsy pg. 21 – based on the Mother Goose nursery rhyme, “Jack Be Nimble”.18. Jack Sprat pg. 159 – I took the title from the old English nursery rhyme.19. Kids’ Menu pg. 28 – I’ve often wondered about chicken fingers . . . I mean, if chickens have fingers, do they pick their beaks?20. Lazy Eye pg. 128 – when I was a kid, I was told I had a lazy eye. As an adult, I’m pretty sure I have a lazy brain . . . I think?? (I’m too lazy to think about it . . .)21. Liv Loves Her Liverwurst pg. 88 – seriously . . . do you eat this stuff??22. On Top of Spaghetti pg. 134 – this poem’s title was taken from the classic children's song.23. Refrigerator Pizza pg. 50 – when my daughters were young, we made up a game where I’d pretend to make a pizza on their bellies with disgusting food from the refrigerator (which tickled and delighted them greatly!).24. Shopping’s Not for Me pg. 36 – this was ME when I was your age. I hated going to department stores (what you kids would call the mall) because they made me irritable and cranky. Even today, as a married man, my wife still needs to buy me a cookie.25. Why Do Bees Make Honey? pg. 70 – the reference to “Oreos” is, of course, to that delicious cookie made by Nabisco/Mondelēz International.PS...one more!
Short Poem pg. 106 – sometimes I just write too much (I can be too wordy). I wish I could convey my thoughts more concisely, using fewer words. Well . . . now I’m writing too much about this . . .
Hi Folks! If you've enjoyed this bonus content (and learning how I get nauseous on boats), please consider joining my email list!I'll update you on how my book is doing, what I'm working on next, and any events I'll be hosting or joining.To sign up, enter your name and email below, and type "JOIN" in the Message field.Thanks!